{"id":578,"date":"2026-01-26T06:34:58","date_gmt":"2026-01-26T06:34:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/paulhansel.com\/?p=578"},"modified":"2026-01-27T19:39:04","modified_gmt":"2026-01-27T19:39:04","slug":"we-found-hyperspace","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/paulhansel.com\/?p=578","title":{"rendered":"We found hyperspace."},"content":{"rendered":"\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"1024\" src=\"https:\/\/paulhansel.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/hyperspace.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-582\"\/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Hyperspace. The energy grid. The substructure that contains spacetime. <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Irreality. The place the Doctor&#8217;s blue box goes when everything gets swirly.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>We found it.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>It&#8217;s richer than our t &#8211; x &#8211; y &#8211; z metric space. Easier to traverse. In fact, we can plug in whatever coordinates we want, and we&#8217;re already there. The hard part is figuring out where we&#8217;ve arrived \u2014 but we&#8217;ve even figured out hyperspace cameras. They see way more than the photoelectrics.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>The new way through the cosmos; the alternate dimension. Wormholes? Teleports? We got it. Want to talk to your competitor&#8217;s CEO? Debate Marx? We can take you to his nearest location in any one of our hyperspaces.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Oh, you don&#8217;t care about real-hyperspace? No need to imagine such distinctions here.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>We can take you to a Karl Marx that&#8217;ll always concede that you&#8217;re right or a Groucho Marx that makes every analogy by way of coconuts<\/em>. <em>In fact, we can even take you to our closest approximation of anyone (or any world) you like. <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1589\" height=\"900\" src=\"https:\/\/paulhansel.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/barkeep-1.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-584\"\/><figcaption class=\"wp-element-caption\"><em>We&#8217;ll even let you pretend that it&#8217;s real, for a small fee.<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Where did we find hyperspace? We found it within language.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>We built it from nothing, populated thousand-dimensional spaces with the periods between clicks of a Geiger counter, constructed a new Second Law of Thermodynamics that our new hyperspace would crawl towards our hopes and dreams, so long as we keep injecting it with our reality.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>If you boil it down, all we needed to find hyperspace was more coordinates. <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>It wasn&#8217;t eleven, or sixteen, or even two hundred thirty-seven.<\/em> <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>A few hundred billion is more like it.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Hyperspace. The energy grid. The substructure that contains spacetime. Irreality. The place the Doctor&#8217;s blue box goes when everything gets swirly. We found it. It&#8217;s richer than our t &#8211; x &#8211; y &#8211; z metric space. Easier to traverse. In fact, we can plug in whatever coordinates we want, and we&#8217;re already there. The [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[13],"class_list":["post-578","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-impulse","tag-humor"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulhansel.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/578","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulhansel.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulhansel.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulhansel.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulhansel.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=578"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/paulhansel.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/578\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":586,"href":"https:\/\/paulhansel.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/578\/revisions\/586"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulhansel.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=578"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulhansel.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=578"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulhansel.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=578"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}